Key Takeaways
Sometimes it can be hard to tell the difference between a typical adolescent challenge and something more concerning. As a parent or guardian, it’s not always clear when your child may need outside support.
Sleep or appetite changes, mood swings, behavioral outbursts, social withdrawal, or other major changes could signal that your child may benefit from therapy. But if you’re not sure, it’s OK to seek an evaluation.
Therapy can provide a safe space for kids to process emotions, manage stress, and learn coping skills. Providers who work with kids use age-appropriate, evidence-based techniques to help children and families meet their goals.
If you’re a parent or guardian wondering how to recognize if your child needs therapy, you’re not alone. From a toddler having a tantrum to a teen pushing boundaries, kids exhibit challenging behaviors as they grow. But, sometimes, it can be hard to tell the difference between developmentally appropriate behavior and something more concerning.
Fortunately, there are resources that can help you know when to ask for help. In the following guide, we’ll share some signs that may indicate your child could benefit from therapy. But if you’re feeling unsure, talk to your child’s doctor or a mental health professional. Together, you can discuss what you’re noticing, and they can help you determine the best next steps for your child.
Signs your child may benefit from therapy
Some signs that a child may need mental health support are more obvious than others. For example, if a child is harming themselves or others (or has threatened to do so), don’t hesitate to ask for help. The same is true if your child starts to frequently mention death, not wanting to be here, or anything related to suicide.*
But what about situations where it doesn’t seem like there’s an immediate safety concern?
While there’s no surefire indicator that a child needs therapy, the following signs can help you know when to seek support.
Your child’s difficulties aren’t contained to one setting. Challenging thoughts, feelings, and/or behaviors happen at home, school, or with friends.
You’ve noticed a change in your child’s eating or sleeping patterns.
Your child has stopped wanting to do social activities or spend time with friends.
You’ve noticed your child suddenly returning to old behaviors. For example, they might start wetting the bed or sucking their thumb after not engaging in those behaviors for a long time.
Your child is having trouble regulating their emotions. They might cry more frequently or start acting out in anger.
Your child seems sad all the time, and things they used to enjoy no longer seem to interest them.
You’ve noticed a change in your child’s behavior when they’re frustrated or experiencing other uncomfortable emotions. They might bang their head or throw objects.
Keep in mind that this isn’t a definitive list, and you know your child best. If your child exhibits any of the signs listed above, it doesn’t automatically mean they have a mental health concern.
When it comes to identifying an underlying mental health condition, context and timing are important. For example, there are many reasons why a child might suddenly have trouble falling and staying asleep. It could be due to an anxiety disorder. But it could also be due to diet, technology use, or other changes to their daily routine.
Similarly, behavioral regressions like thumb-sucking can be a sign of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). But they can also be a temporary stress response. A child might use these behaviors to self-soothe after a major change like the birth of a sibling or moving to a new home. These gray areas can be understandably confusing for parents and guardians. But if you’re worried about your child for any reason, it’s OK to trust your gut and ask for help. A therapist can provide an evaluation to determine whether they have a mental health condition.
*A note on safety: If your child is expressing thoughts of harming themselves, don’t hesitate to ask for help. You can contact the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988 from any phone. Their counselors will provide confidential support and resources to help keep your child safe. For life-threatening emergencies or immediate assistance, call 911.
How does therapy work for children?
Therapy is used to help children manage psychological challenges that are affecting how they feel, think, act, and learn. It can help them cope with change and other stressors, regulate their emotions, and choose safer behaviors. Therapy for children usually involves parents and guardians. Sometimes, it involves other family members too. When a child goes to therapy, they have a supportive space to talk about their feelings and learn coping strategies at their own pace.
Two of the most effective forms of therapy for children are behavioral therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). Behavioral therapy is typically used for disruptive behavioral disorders like oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) or conduct disorder (CD). It helps improve self-regulation and focuses on behavior management through parent training in behavior management.
CBT can also be used to help with challenging behaviors. But it focuses on interrupting unhelpful patterns and increasing coping skills. CBT is frequently used for children living with:
In addition to behavioral or talk therapy, children might do creative or interactive activities with their therapist. Therapists who work with children use evidence-based, age-appropriate approaches to help their clients meet their goals. For example, a therapist might incorporate art therapy, play therapy, or sandplay therapy. These types of therapy can provide a way for kids to express themselves, practice problem-solving, learn social skills, and increase their self-esteem.
Why early intervention matters for children
Early intervention can keep a child’s challenges from escalating and help them learn lifelong coping strategies. It can help them manage their emotions, lessen stress, form healthy relationships, choose safer behaviors, and prevent significant complications in adulthood.
If you think that your child or teen might need support, talk to their pediatrician or other healthcare provider. Let them know what you’re noticing, and ask for a referral to a therapist and/or psychiatrist who specializes in working with children and teens. You can also search online directories or telehealth platforms for providers your child can meet with online, from the comfort of home. Remember, timely support can improve outcomes for your child and help them live a full, balanced life.
Clinician's take
A common misconception is that therapy means something is ‘wrong’ with their child. In reality, therapy can give kids a supportive space to express themselves, learn coping skills, and feel understood.
Find care with Rula
As a parent or guardian, it can be tough to know when to worry. Most children exhibit challenging behaviors from time to time, and it’s not always clear when they might benefit from therapy. If your child is at risk of harming themselves or others, seek help right away. But changes in eating or sleep patterns, peer relationships, emotions, and behavior can also signal that your child may need support.
If you’re not sure whether your child needs therapy, talk to their pediatrician or other providers. They can talk to you about your concerns and help determine the best next steps for your child.
At Rula, we’re committed to delivering a comprehensive behavioral health experience that helps people feel seen and understood so they can get back to feeling their best.
Rula makes it easier to find a licensed therapist or psychiatric provider who accepts your insurance so you don’t have to choose between affordable care and excellent care. With a diverse network of more than 15,000 providers, 24/7 crisis support, and appointments available as soon as tomorrow, we're here to help you make progress — wherever you are on your mental health journey.
