Across the U.S., teenage suicide is on the rise. Today, it’s one of the leading causes of death among young people.
Learning the warning signs and talking about suicide are two of the best ways a parent can support a teen at risk for suicide. Although these conversations can be challenging, they can save a life.
When discussing suicide with your teen, be direct, ask open-ended questions, and offer support without minimizing their pain. It’s also important to consult with professionals like therapists, psychiatrists or school counselors for additional support.
Suicide is one of the leading causes of death for teens in the U.S. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), about 1 in 5 high schoolers attempted suicide in 2023. And unfortunately, that number is on the rise.
As a parent or guardian, these heartbreaking statistics can be difficult to face. And if a teen in your life has expressed thoughts of self-harm or suicide, you might be unsure how to respond. You may worry about saying the wrong thing. Or you might fear that asking your teen about suicide could increase their risk.
These fears and worries are common. Suicide can be uncomfortable to discuss, and many parents aren’t sure how to talk about it with their kids. But you don’t need to be an expert to offer lifesaving support. The following information can help you have a compassionate, productive conversation with your teen about suicide.
*A note on safety: If a teen in your life has expressed thoughts of harming themselves, don’t hesitate to ask for help. You can contact the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988 from any phone. Their counselors will provide confidential support and resources to help keep them safe. If it’s an emergency, call 911.
Why are teenagers at higher risk of suicide?
Young people are taking their lives at increasing rates, especially after the COVID-19 pandemic. We aren’t sure of all the reasons why. But researchers have uncovered some factors that may increase a teen’s risk:
Having a previous suicide attempt
Drug or alcohol use
Exploring their sexual orientation in an unsupportive environment
Having a family history of suicide
Not having enough social support
Access to firearms, pills, or other lethal means
Low self-esteem
Experiencing shame or stigma around asking for help
Not having access to necessary resources (i.e. mental healthcare)
Having depression, a trauma-related mental health condition, or a stress-related mental health condition
Spending too much time on social media
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What you can do to support your teen
If you’re concerned about your teen, one of the best things you can do is familiarize yourself with the warning signs of suicide. These include things like giving away prized possessions, talking about death or suicide, big changes in eating or sleeping habits, or a sudden drop in academic performance. You can review a full list of suicide warning signs here.
You can also support your teen through talking to them and letting them know they aren’t alone. Talking about suicide isn’t easy. But it can save a life.
Here are some tips to help you navigate these important conversations:
Be direct. If a teen is at risk for suicide, or you think they might be, don’t use euphemisms. Instead, use straightforward statements like, “I want to talk to you about suicide.”
Ask open-ended questions. Avoid saying things like, “You aren’t thinking about hurting yourself, are you?” This is a leading question that only requires a yes-or-no answer. Instead, ask an open-ended question like, “Can you tell me what kinds of thoughts you’ve been having about hurting yourself?”
Don’t minimize. Hearing your teen admit that they’re contemplating suicide can be terrifying. Your first impulse might be to respond with, “You have so much to live for!” But that can be invalidating. So instead, say something like, “I can tell that you’re in a lot of pain right now. I want you to know that I see that, and I want to help.”
Keep checking in. If your teen isn’t ready to talk or seek help right away, don’t give up. They might resist help at first. Let them know that you’d like to follow up and that you’ll be there whenever they want to talk. Be present and available. But if there’s an immediate safety concern, dial 988 or 911 right away.
Getting support with youth suicide prevention
If your teen is at risk for suicide, remember you aren’t alone. A variety of resources and professionals can help keep your teen safe, including:
Doctors: Family doctors or pediatricians are often the first line of defense in suicide prevention. They can provide a referral to crisis resources (if needed), mental health professionals, and other resources.
Therapists: Some therapists specialize in working with teens. They can identify, diagnose, and treat the underlying concerns that may be contributing to their suicidal thoughts and self-harm.
Psychiatrists: Psychiatrists are medical doctors who specialize in mental health and can prescribe medication to teens. Depending on your teen’s diagnosis and other needs, medication can be an effective tool for suicide prevention, alongside other supports.
School counselors: Your child’s school counselor may offer individual or small-group counseling, which your teen can access during the school day. They may also be aware of suicide prevention supports in your area.
Advocacy organizations: LGBTQ+ youth are more than four times as likely to attempt suicide as their peers. The Trevor Project offers free, 24/7 crisis support for LGBTQ+ teens. You can reach them by texting ‘start’ to 678-678 or calling 1-866-488-7386.
A common misconception is that talking about suicide will plant the idea. In reality, having open, honest conversations helps teens feel heard and supported, which can actually reduce their risk.
Brandy Chalmers, LPC
Clinical reviewer
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Teenage suicide is a growing problem in the U.S. In 2023, about 1 in 5 high school students attempted to take their lives. As a parent or guardian, you can play a powerful role in suicide prevention. In addition to learning the warning signs, it’s important to talk to your teen about suicide.
These can be challenging conversations. But by using direct communication, asking open-ended questions, avoiding minimizing, and repeatedly checking in, you can help save a life. You can also contact a doctor, a therapist, a psychiatrist, your child’s school counselor, or an advocacy organization for additional help. However, if your child is in immediate danger, don’t hesitate to contact crisis support at 988 or 911.
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Liz Talago
Liz Talago, M.ed. is a mental health professional turned content writer and strategist based in the Detroit metro area. As an independent consultant for mental health organizations, Liz creates meaningful connections between brands and their audiences through strategic storytelling. Liz is known for championing diverse perspectives within the mental health industry and translating bold ideas into inspiring, affirming digital experiences.
In her free time, you can find her hiking with her two German Shepherds, puttering around her dahlia garden, or spending time with her family.
Brandy Chalmers, LPC
Having faced challenges like childhood abuse, neglect, and the loss of her father to suicide, Brandy Chalmers is deeply passionate about providing compassionate care. She is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Nationally Certified Counselor, and Registered Play Therapist with a Master’s Degree in Clinical Counseling and Marriage and Family Therapy.
Brandy also teaches at a university, sharing her expertise with future mental health professionals. With over a decade of experience in settings like inpatient care and private practice, she specializes in helping clients with perfectionism, trauma, personality disorders, eating disorders, and life changes.
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