Food shaming happens when someone criticizes your food choices or eating habits.
Over time, food shaming can create guilt and anxiety around food. And, in some cases, it can lead to an eating disorder.
Seeking professional support can help you work through feelings of shame and guilt around eating and build positive eating habits.
Maybe you grew up hearing your mom sigh and scold herself every time she enjoyed a rich dessert. Or you had a grandparent who’d say, “Are you really going to eat all that?” when you asked for seconds. That’s food shaming. These types of interactions can influence how you feel about eating, your body, and affect your self-worth.
Food shaming is more common than you might think. Nearly 3 in 10 Americans say they’ve experienced it, either from others making comments about what they eat or from feeling ashamed about their own eating habits. In some cases, food shaming can lead to unhealthy behaviors like restricting food, binge eating, or purging, which are all signs of an eating disorder.
What food shaming can look like
Food shaming happens when society teaches us to label foods as “good” or “bad” and to judge others for what they eat. It’s often tied to body image, control, and the idea that a person’s worth can be measured by their eating habits.
Food shaming can come from anyone: family, friends, partners, or even coworkers. They might tease you about how much you eat or make comments about your food choices. Even if it’s meant as a joke, those words can chip away at your confidence and make meals stressful instead of enjoyable.
Some examples of food shaming:
At work: A coworker sees you eating abobo, a traditional Filipino dish, and says, “That lunch looks weird. What is that?” Comments like this don’t just shame the food but also dismiss the culture behind it. This can leave someone feeling embarrassed or pressured to hide what they eat.
In a relationship: Your partner might say, “I thought you wanted to lose weight” when you reach for bread at a restaurant. That comment isn’t just about food but implies judgment and can create guilt and shame around eating.
With family: Maybe your parents restricted certain snacks they considered “bad” or made rules like finishing your dinner before dessert. While meant to encourage healthy eating, these rules can leave lasting effects. Children may grow up feeling guilty or anxious about certain foods.
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How guilt impacts our relationship with food
Food shaming can take a heavy toll on your mental health. Constant negative comments about what or how you eat can completely change how you see food.
Some consequences include:
Low self-esteem: Constant criticism can make you feel insecure about your body and your food choices.
Emotional eating: When food shaming causes negative feelings, some people cope by turning to food for comfort. They might reach for sugary or high-fat foods that provide a temporary mood boost.
Unhealthy eating habits: Over time, food shaming can lead to binge eating, hiding food, and skipping meals. These habits can lead to eating disorders like anorexia nervosa or bulimia.
Depression and anxiety: Being judged for what you eat can make you feel hopeless or anxious about eating in front of others.
Social isolation: Some people avoid meals with family and friends to escape judgment.
Trauma triggers: If you were shamed about food as a child, new comments can reopen those wounds and make it even harder to feel good about eating.
Healthy ways to overcome food shame
The good news is you can overcome food shaming. By learning to tune out negative voices and focusing on your own needs, you can replace shame with confidence and self-acceptance.
It can help to spend time with people who respect your choices and avoid those who put you down. If you need help setting boundaries or healing from food shaming, a therapist can guide you toward a healthier relationship with food.
If you’re living with an eating disorder, it’s important to seek professional support. Different types of treatments are available, and early intervention improves your chances of fully recovering.
Here are some other self-care strategies that can help:
Challenge the message. Ask yourself if the comment is genuine concern about your health or just someone else’s opinion.
Recognize food shaming. Pay attention to when you feel judged and name it for what it is. It may help to write down these experiences so you can notice patterns over time.
Set clear boundaries. Healthy boundaries can help you feel safe and more confident. Tell others their remarks aren’t helpful. You might say something like, “Thanks for your input, but I feel good about my food choices.”
Try mindful eating. Mindfulness practices can help you stay focused on your experience in the present moment. Mindful eating involves slowing down to notice how your food tastes and how your body feels.
Practice self-compassion. Replace negative self-talk with kinder thoughts, like, “I deserve to enjoy this meal.”
Shift your mindset. Remind yourself that no food is “good” or “bad.” All foods can fit into a balanced diet. Working with a therapist can help you begin to shift your thinking with practice.
A subtle form of food shaming that often goes unrecognized is when comments about what someone eats are framed as lighthearted or flattering. It doesn’t sound harsh, but it still reinforces judgment around food.
Brandy Chalmers, LPC
Clinical reviewer
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If food shaming is affecting your daily life or mental health, therapy can help. A therapist can offer a safe space to share your feelings, challenge negative thoughts, and set boundaries with people who make hurtful comments. With time, therapy can guide you toward a healthier relationship with food.
At Rula, we’re committed to delivering a comprehensive behavioral health experience that helps people feel seen and understood so they can get back to feeling their best.
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Linda Childers
Linda is an award-winning medical writer with experience writing for major media outlets, health companies, hospitals, and both consumer and trade print and digital outlets.
Her articles have appeared in the Washington Post, USA Today, WebMD, AARP, Brain+Life, HealthyWomen.org, The Rheumatologist, California Health Report, Everyday Health, HealthCentral, and many other media outlets.
While juggling the responsibilities of being part of the “sandwich generation” and caring for both her toddler son and terminally ill mother, a nurse friend encouraged her to seek therapy, which helped her to learn coping strategies and manage her depression. Linda hopes her work will help to destigmatize mental health conditions and encourage others to get the help they need.
Brandy Chalmers, LPC
Having faced challenges like childhood abuse, neglect, and the loss of her father to suicide, Brandy Chalmers is deeply passionate about providing compassionate care. She is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Nationally Certified Counselor, and Registered Play Therapist with a Master’s Degree in Clinical Counseling and Marriage and Family Therapy.
Brandy also teaches at a university, sharing her expertise with future mental health professionals. With over a decade of experience in settings like inpatient care and private practice, she specializes in helping clients with perfectionism, trauma, personality disorders, eating disorders, and life changes.
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