A person’s self-concept is the ideas and beliefs that shape how they see themselves. It can involve their appearance, abilities, relationships, and more.
A healthy or positive self-concept means you can acknowledge your flaws without letting them define you. It’s about learning to see yourself in a generally positive light.
It’s possible to strengthen your self-concept, and therapy can help.
Your self-concept consists of the ideas and beliefs you hold to be true about yourself. It’s a way of answering the question, “Who am I?”, and it includes physical and psychological traits, skills, characteristics, roles, qualities, talents, and more.
Self-concept [1] includes observable traits that you can consciously identify. For example, part of your self-concept may be that you have brown hair, two siblings, and like to run marathons. But other aspects of self-concept are less concrete. Aspects like your role in your family, your career history, or physical health can also impact how you see yourself.
Exploring the external and internal forces that influence your self-concept can help you embrace your identity and strengthen your mental health [2]. In the following guide, we’re sharing four important things to know about self-concept and a few tips on how to improve it.
1. It’s more than just a list of traits
From our appearance and personality type to our beliefs and interests, we all have unique characteristics that make up our identity. But self-concept isn’t just a list of traits. It’s a way for us to understand ourselves and our relationship to the world around us.
Your self-concept includes what you believe to be true about yourself right now. But it also includes what you see as possible for yourself in the future. These beliefs are often influenced [3] by our academic or career performance, gender, religion, racial identity, family system, and more.
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2. It’s not the same as self-esteem (but it’s close)
Scholars have provided a few different definitions of self-concept. But perhaps one of the most well-known comes from American psychologist Carl Rogers [4].
Rogers believed that self-concept consisted of three parts:
Self-esteem: How we evaluate ourselves (appearance, abilities, achievements, and more)
Self-image: The mental picture of how we see ourselves in the present
The ideal self: A version of ourselves we hope to achieve in the future
3. It won’t always stay the same
Self-concept isn’t static and unchanging. It starts developing in childhood [5] and will evolve over the course of your life.
Your self-concept may be influenced by:
The environment of where you live [6] and the places you visit
Your relationships with caregivers, friends, loved ones, neighbors, and others
The culture you’re a part of [7] and how it views self-concept
The media you consume [8] (TV shows, movies, books, podcasts, social media, and more)
4. It doesn’t mean ignoring your shortcomings
Having a healthy self-concept doesn’t mean being conceited or overlooking your shortcomings. After all, no one is perfect, and it’s OK to acknowledge your flaws. What matters most is seeing yourself clearly and cultivating an overall positive view of yourself.
A health self-concept might sound like:
“I tend to get flustered when I’m under pressure. But I know I have the skills to manage my stress level and get things done.”
“I love being creative. I might not be Picasso, but that’s OK. I enjoy painting because it gives me an outlet for my emotions.”
“One of the things I’m most proud of is that I’m a good friend. I always try to show up for the people I care about, even if it’s just in small ways.”
“In the past, I let my mistakes define me. These days, I do my best to learn from them so that I can improve.”
How to develop a positive self-concept
If you want to develop a positive self-concept, these tips can help you get started:
Quiet your inner critic. Imagine having a negative belief about yourself, like, “I’m a terrible public speaker.” In response, see if you can reframe it in a more positive light. You can say something like, “I’m not the best public speaker, but I’m a lot better than I used to be.” Curbing self-criticism can help strengthen your self-concept.
Inventory your strengths. If you tend to focus on your struggles instead of your strengths, you’re not alone. It’s easy to overlook our positive qualities when we’re facing challenges. The next time you’re feeling down on yourself, set a timer for five minutes and write down as many of your strengths as you can. You can list physical attributes, but try to include traits, skills, and talents too.
Rethink your digital role models. If you find yourself comparing yourself to others, remember that what people share publicly or online is often a highlight reel. It doesn’t paint the full picture of the everyday hardships most people face. If the social media you’re consuming tends to make you feel bad about yourself, audit your feed. Unfollow unsupportive or unrealistic creators, and look for more supportive, encouraging content to engage with.
Ask for help. If you want to work on your self-concept, help is available. Person-centered therapy [9] can be especially impactful for people who are grappling with their sense of self. This type of therapy creates a strong therapeutic alliance built on unconditional positive regard. It can provide a safe space to explore your identity, examine negative beliefs, and honor your authentic self.
A common misconception is believing that a healthy self-concept means feeling confident all the time. In reality, it looks more like knowing your worth even on the days you feel unsure.
Ashley Ayala, LMFT
Clinical reviewer
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Self-concept is the set of ideas and beliefs that shape how you see yourself. It starts forming in childhood and can be influenced by your environment, relationships, experiences, and more as life goes on. Having a healthy self-concept doesn’t mean ignoring your shortcomings. Rather, it’s about embracing all aspects of your identity and seeing yourself in a generally positive light. Therapy can help you explore your identity, cultivate self-compassion, and strengthen your self-concept.
At Rula, we’re here to help you feel better. Rula makes it easy to find a licensed therapist or psychiatric provider who takes your insurance. That way, you don’t have to choose between great care and a price you can afford.
Rula patients pay about $15 per session with insurance, and 93% say they feel better after getting care through Rula. We have 21,000+ providers, and appointments are available as soon as tomorrow. We’re here to help you take the next step — wherever you are in your mental health journey.
References
- self-concept https://dictionary.apa.org/self-concept
- Me, Myself, and I: Therapy and Self-Concept Change in College Students https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/87568225.2023.2198154
- Self-Understanding and Assessment https://www.isbe.net/CTEDocuments/FCS-650022.pdf
- Rediscovering Rogers's Self Theory and Personality https://www.researchgate.net/publication/286456614_Rediscovering_Rogers%27s_Self_Theory_and_Personality
- The role of parents' and teachers' beliefs in children's self-concept development https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S019339731630020X?via%3Dihub
- What about place? Considering the role of physical environment on youth imagining of future possible selves https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/13676261.2013.836591
- Beyond the ‘east–west’ dichotomy: Global variation in cultural models of selfhood. https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Fxge0000175
- The Interrelated Roles of Mass Media and Social Media in Adolescents’ Development of an Objectified Self-Concept: A Longitudinal Study https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0093650215600488
- Person-Centered Therapy (Rogerian Therapy) https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK589708/
Liz Talago
Liz Talago, M.ed. is a mental health professional turned content writer and strategist based in the Detroit metro area. As an independent consultant for mental health organizations, Liz creates meaningful connections between brands and their audiences through strategic storytelling. Liz is known for championing diverse perspectives within the mental health industry and translating bold ideas into inspiring, affirming digital experiences.
In her free time, you can find her hiking with her two German Shepherds, puttering around her dahlia garden, or spending time with her family.
Ashley Ayala, LMFT
Ashley is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who specializes in generational healing and family dynamics. Ashley has worked in schools, clinics, and in private practice. She believes that people’s relationships, including our relationship with ourselves, greatly shape our experiences in life.
Ashley is committed to empowering others to show up authentically and deepen their self understanding. This passion stems from taking a critical lens on her own life story and doing inner healing. One of her favorite quotes is “Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.”
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