Returning to a “normal” routine often requires more than just physical healing. It may also require emotional regulation and patience.
Feeling “off” after things settle down is common. When your usual tools aren’t enough, it may be a sign that you need more support, not less.
Real progress in mental healthcare often means balancing the joy of reaching a personal goal with the pragmatic reality of difficult life transitions.
“I should probably get back into therapy.”
For a long time, that sentence was just a quiet thought I kept tucked away. I’d been in therapy before, but I eventually stopped because I was feeling good. I thought I had the "tools" I needed. Then, earlier this year, I had a breast reduction. It was my first ever surgery, and it was something I’d worked toward for a long time. I felt a huge wave of happiness when I finally reached that milestone.
You might have had a moment like this too, where things felt stable enough that support starts to fade into the background.
But I didn't consider the mental toll the recovery would take. On top of a new romantic relationship and other big transitions in my life, my brain was stuck in a loop. I was going back and forth between the shaky, high-wire adrenaline of the weeks leading up to the procedure and the sudden, quiet thud of being home and healing. My anxiety was through the roof.
Big life events — even positive ones — can put your nervous system under strain. This is because the body doesn’t always distinguish between excitement and stress. Even though I’d spent years building emotional regulation skills, those tools felt out of reach while I was managing post-op complications and trying to understand a body that felt completely new.
When “back to normal” doesn’t feel normal
The hardest part of my journey didn’t happen in the operating room. It happened about three weeks to a month after surgery. This is the period when the world expects you to jump back into your work life and daily routine. On the outside, people saw someone who was "recovered." But on the inside, I was still healing, and the world didn't stop moving for me. It’s important to remember that recovery doesn’t always follow the timeline people expect.
I also felt the weight of everything happening both in the U.S. and around the world. Because I was already feeling physically vulnerable, I found myself scrolling through newsfeeds late into the night, looking for some kind of comfort but only finding more reasons to feel on edge. My thumb would move through the headlines before I even realized I’d opened the app.
When your system already feels overwhelmed, even small inputs can act as triggers and increase that sense of urgency or unease. Between the global chaos and my own physical complications, I didn't feel safe in my body. I realized I couldn’t just wait for the feeling to pass. I needed a person to help me find my footing again.
If you’ve ever had a moment where things feel off and you keep telling yourself it will pass, this might feel familiar.
Identifying what I needed
When I began to seek therapy this time, I knew I needed a specific approach to help me learn to feel grounded. I decided to look for a provider who specialized in somatic therapy. This method focuses on the connection between the mind and body, which was exactly what I needed to find my center after such an intense physical change and the overwhelm of the digital world.
When anxiety shows up in the body, approaches that focus on physical awareness can help you feel more settled and connected again. For that reason, I wanted to find a therapist who specialized in navigating complex feelings and could guide me in a down-to-earth way. Because my needs were so specific, I had to be intentional about my search. Taking the time to identify my budget and check my insurance coverage was a necessary step to ensure that I could commit to the long-term work of somatic healing.
If your needs feel specific, it’s OK to take your time finding the right fit. That process is part of the work.
The first session and beyond
Heading into my first appointment, I felt nervous but optimistic. Logistically, the intake process was straightforward, but emotionally, it was a lot to process. My therapist played a huge role in helping me set goals that felt realistic rather than overwhelming.
Starting again can feel like a big step, even if you’ve done therapy before. That hesitation is normal.
Since starting, I’ve already seen progress in how I handle day-to-day stress. I still have those “through-the-roof” moments, but I no longer feel like I'm on an island. Instead, I feel guided to keep making progress, and I know that I’m supported every step of the way.
If you’re in a season where your tools aren’t enough, it may not mean you’re doing something wrong. It may just mean you need more support.
The care you need, when you need it
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When you move from high stress into recovery, your nervous system doesn’t immediately slow down. It can stay in that alert state, which can feel like anxiety or being stuck. If you notice this, try focusing on one small, grounding action each day, like stepping outside or slowing your breathing. These small signals can help your body start to feel safe again over time.
Brandy Chalmers, LPC
Clinical reviewer
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Support is available for every step of your journey. If you're feeling nervous about starting therapy, remember that it's a relationship that grows with you as you move toward feeling better.
At Rula, we’re here to help you feel better. Rula makes it easy to find a licensed therapist or psychiatric provider who takes your insurance. That way, you don’t have to choose between great care and a price you can afford.
Rula patients pay about $15 per session with insurance, and 93% say they feel better after getting care through Rula. We have 21,000+ providers, and appointments are available as soon as tomorrow. We’re here to help you take the next step — wherever you are in your mental health journey.
Haleigh Fullilove
Haleigh Fullilove is a mental health advocate and the social media and influencer marketing lead at Rula, where she works to make mental healthcare feel less intimidating and more accessible — one story at a time. With nearly a decade of experience in social media, brand storytelling, and building community online, she came to this work with both professional conviction and personal experience. She believes that talking openly about therapy and being vulnerable is one of the most powerful things we can do for ourselves and each other.
When Haleigh is offline, you can find her at the ceramics wheel, at a concert, thrifting, spending quality time with loved ones, exploring new coffeeshops, lying in the park, or at home in Brooklyn with her cats, Sage and Sprout.
Brandy Chalmers, LPC
Having faced challenges like childhood abuse, neglect, and the loss of her father to suicide, Brandy Chalmers is deeply passionate about providing compassionate care. She is a Licensed Professional Counselor, Nationally Certified Counselor, and Registered Play Therapist with a Master’s Degree in Clinical Counseling and Marriage and Family Therapy.
Brandy also teaches at a university, sharing her expertise with future mental health professionals. With over a decade of experience in settings like inpatient care and private practice, she specializes in helping clients with perfectionism, trauma, personality disorders, eating disorders, and life changes.
Rula’s editorial process
Rula’s editorial team is on a mission to make science-backed mental health insights accessible and practical for every person seeking to better understand or improve mental wellness.
Members of Rula’s clinical leadership team and other expert providers contribute to all published content, offering guidance on themes and insights based on their firsthand experience in the field. Every piece of content is thoroughly reviewed by a clinician before publishing.
